Isaiah 54:2 “Enlarge the place of your tent, and let the curtains of your habitations be stretched out; do not hold back; lengthen your cords and strengthen your stakes.”
When I left my first job, I left a good salary, good friends, and good opportunities for a higher position and employee retention. My family was so worried about me, my decision, and our finances. Little did they know how difficult it was for me. I cried for so many nights before I finally handed my resignation letter to our Regional Director. Working at the Department of Science and Technology was my dream job. I remember how much I prayed to Jesus just to get that job right after I finished my Computer Science Degree in 2009. I cried out loud to God to give me that position and now I’m taking it all for granted? More than anything else, I was afraid of how will my Father react to my decision. I asked my fellow Christians to pray for me and our missionary told me to “stay in the boat where you can be saved”-Acts 27:31.
Again, I cried for so many nights after hearing this impression from her. My Lord, should I stay or leave? I was so afraid for leaving. So afraid that my decision would sabotage my career.
When I started writing this, I thought of not telling you the main reason why I left my job. I’m kind of uncomfortable because it was something like being childish and yes, I would say I’m kind of immature during those trying times. But I have to tell this knowing that I’m already released from my past hurts. I was 20 years old when I got the job and I am the youngest employee at the time. My boss was in her late 50’s and I understand her going through a menopausal stage. But there were days when I don’t really want to go to work because of her temper. I am not used to being scolded by my parents or by anyone that’s why things become unbearable for me whenever I hear discouraging words or negative facial expressions from her. There were times when I was so hurt but I couldn’t say a word because I always believe that “a boss is always a boss”. Maybe I was going through a “culture shock” in the corporate world and I wasn’t able to handle myself. God knows how much I loved my job and the fact that my responsibility is helping in the strengthening of the scholarship program in the region. I am very happy about helping the less privileged yet deserving students get through their studies. But it was challenging. I wasn’t able to make it. I left.
I assured my family that this is something they should not worry about because I already found another job. I left on the 3rd of January 2011. However, God has opened a new door for me on the 4th of the same month. My new employer is a Non-voice BPO company where I learned SEO, Social Media Marketing, and other online marketing jobs. Every day as I walk through the stairs up to our office, I would ask myself if I made the right decision. For the first 3 months of being there, I admit that I haven’t gotten over with my first job yet. Every payday, I have this little regrets about leaving my well-paying job. Thoughts like, “If I didn’t left, I would have received an increase by now” or “Paying for my sister’s school fees would not be difficult as this”. I even wanted to blame someone who made me leave. I was depressed. I even had bad dreams about that person and I would wake up in the middle of the night crying. I don’t think I can forgive the person. Who should I blame for what happened to my career? And it becomes harder when I started to put the blame on me. Sometimes I would cry myself out while riding on my way home from work. It was tough, especially in terms of finances.
Every night, I would pray to Jesus to help me get over from my last job and focus on my new career. I tried so hard to learn new skills and I started to like everything. I found new friends and get to laugh with them during our break time and after office hours. Above all, I met a very kind and cool boss. Little by little I’ve forgotten my heartbreaking experience of leaving my dream job. However, I have to earn bigger because of my family’s needs. After 2 years, I left the company and found a good job online. I started to work right at the comfort of our home. God has blessed me with a nice client. As an Independent Contractor, I was able to enjoy my work and the presence of my family as well. I work from home and it was like being your own boss. That lasted for 5 months and again I looked for another job until I was hired in another government agency- the Department of Health.
Does history really repeat itself? Again, I worked with a very hot-tempered boss. This job was more challenging than my first job! Oh, my God, I didn’t know what I’ve been doing to work with these kinds of people. All I ever wanted is to have a peaceful career and gentle co-workers. But this is the opposite of what I wanted. This time, God taught me to pray for people to have a change of heart. And I saw the changes. God taught me to tame people. To deal with them in the proper way and in prayer, regardless of the situation. My boss was kind of tough and brave, so I learned to be brave- the right way.
That job lasted for 6 months because I need to improve my income for the sake of my family. You know what? I cried at every job I’ve had. I feel like something is lacking. I need to find my place. Sometimes I wonder if I really belong to the corporate world or it would be better if I go on mission works. If only becoming a missionary could be that easy but I think God is putting me where I should be. He kept on repeating the challenges maybe because I need to learn something I missed.
Again, I left the job with a happy heart. My co-workers and my boss didn’t want me to leave but I need to. I have to support my family in the best way I could. This is my calling. When I left, I was really touched by the words from my boss. She thanked me for everything and even said that I was the best worker she ever met. That really touched my heart. For 3 months I worked online on a part-time basis. I met new friends and nice people. I learned new skills. I learned to be patient. And waited for the best job that God was preparing for me. That was the lowest-paying job I had. However, God was there to support my family’s needs. God’s provision was always there.
One day, I told my God that I can’t stay in this position. I need to improve in character, skills and even my finances. I am a servant and I have the authority to ask the Father for my needs. I hunted for the best jobs online until one day God surprised me with the best job and the best client I ever had! And guess what, my client was a Christian. They compensate well and gave me a raise after 3 months. Everything was perfected by God. Everything that happened is a part of His greater plans. Wherever I am right now in my career, I know His plans are better than my plans and desires, always!
Working right in the comfort of my own home is a great favor from God. I even get to spend more time with my family and help them with their needs. I get to help my sisters take good care of our elder sister who is in the state of coma. I have more time to take care of my nephews when needed. I have time for outreaches because I can manage my time. It’s not being a martyr but this is LOVE.
I really thank God for a change of heart after those hurtful events in my career. God gave me a forgiving heart. He erased all the bad memories I kept for a long time. I even learned to pray for the people who hurt me. God made me realize that ‘unforgiveness’ is like a poison you take within you and may kill you little by little. I can’t blame anyone for my decisions. I have to learn to forgive those who oppressed me and learn to forgive myself also.
I currently work as a Virtual Assistant and I believe this is where God wanted me to be at the moment. I saw that when I left everything to God, He handles everything for me. And for you, wherever you are right now, keep pressing on your goals. God never forgets you, even once! He will handle you.
Wherever God will take me, I know it is going to be a place where He can bless me…
“THOSE WHO LEAVE EVERYTHING IN GOD’S HAND WILL EVENTUALLY SEE GOD’S HAND IN EVERYTHING”
